Do/Don't Essay

Survival:

Let me tell you about the ways how to stay sane, and functioning properly after being in group homes for a prolonged period of time. It's not easy. The two hardest things I did was get control of my anger, and set the goal of bettering my future and following through with it.

I don't mean to imply in the least that life in the group home environment is at all easy— it's not. But in a way after a while it tends to seem like it is easier, but in all actuality it is not the programs or treatment therapy that has gotten easier, it is the natural occurrence of most situations in life. An individual becomes acclimated to that specific situation, you start to actually apply within yourself the things you learn, while in the program.

In the mean time let me shed some light on the behavioral customs that should be integrated, and of those that should not be engaged in to survive the lifestyle of prolonged group home living and come out sane and emotionally stable.

DO: work on your written treatment therapy and give it legitimate, well thought through time and effort whenever an opportunity arises. I know from first hand experience that us teenagers tend to have "more important" things to do- but I have had the sage wisdom come unto me after five years in state's custody, and programs that my conclusion is that treatment therapy is pretty damn important, at least for me, because going home and being free is pretty damn important to me!

DON'T: fake it to make it, it doesn't work. I would know because it didn't work at my last two group homes, so Stop It, Because not only does it not work but never ever has it remotely worked at least not in the long-term success category. If one chooses this barren, desolate road, then relapse is inevitable.

DO: Emotionally, mentally, and physically hit the refresh button inside of you when going from one situation into another totally different situation. Relax and start new. Put the previous situation in its own file in the back of your mind. Deal with it when the need arises, and focus your efforts on the current situation at hand, as if it's a brand new day, aside of any previous thoughts and emotions. Thus compartmentalizing occurs. For example- if I were to be struggling at my current placement; program, proctor, independent living, etc, and we're feeling any self-incriminating emotions that were hostile, hurtful, depressing, etc, once I go to school and are around different people, and in a new situation. I keep my placement feelings chained firmly to my placement- and my emotions and attitudes are refreshed and ready on a new clean slate for the school environment, and the people with whom I interact and associate with in that particular environment. Once I'm back in my current placement environment I readdress the emotions and environment accordingly.

DONT: Keep going on doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results. For this is the definition of insanity. If you keep doing this it will make it so much harder to make any progress in the current placement your in, and it decreases any chance of you successfully completing that placement. It also increased your relapse risk assessment, then you will be deemed even more risky to not only yourself but to those around you.

DO: Be rational. Act on logic. Seriously think through the situation and the possible outcomes of the situation, but...

DONT: At the same time, not allow yourself to experience the emotions that come with the situation. It's perfectly fine to go through the emotions—long as you then choose to express them in an non-confrontational, appropriate, logically-rational mannerism.

But whatever you DO: keep on giving it your best. Don't shoot for the ten yard line, but instead the end zone. Do all the things above and success is inevitable. Follow the words of my good buddy Joe Dirt, "just keep on keeping on!"

Also try your best to keep up a positive attitude and good self-morale, by looking to the following quote as a guide, "Two men looking out of jail bars, one sees the mud, the other sees the stars." TRY TO SEE THE STARS!